Day 4: Discern Your Values

The last few days you've been generating ideas and envisioning your future, getting a little crazy, and pondering the possibilities. So many possibilities - it's tiring! It's exciting. It's improbable. 

Stephen Covey says, "For many of us, there's a gap between the compass and the clock - between what's deeply important to us and the way we spend our time." (First Things First, 1994.)

The clock is your commitments, schedules, and how you manage your time. The compass is your vision, mission, values, beliefs, and principles, and how you want to proceed down your path. Most of our dissatisfaction in life comes from the gap - when what we are doing doesn't lead where the compass is pointing.

Before you can truly map your path, then, you need to get a handle on your core values, beliefs, and principles. Discernment of this nature is not easy or quick; today you will make a start at it, and you'll return to refine and affirm your values and principles later. (Just do what you have time for today.)

First some definitions:

-Values are subjective, personal, emotional, and arguable. We practice our values (such as "work hard and play by the rules", "live simply so that others may simply live"), and they guide our behaviors.

-Principles are universal truths (integrity, honesty, equality) based on natural laws; they are objective, factual, impersonal, and indisputable. We can't practice principles - they just ARE.

But don't worry about the distinctions - just lump them all together. If you list a principle, like integrity, then you will eventually need to define a value that supports it, such as "Hold one standard of truth", but keep it simple for now!

Also, if you are drawn to a particular value or principle but you don't always follow it, that doesn't mean it's not a guiding principle or core value; these are our shining examples and what we aspire to.

• Start by answering these queries: 

-What peak experiences have you had in your life and what values were you honoring with them?

-Beyond your basic human needs, what must you have in your life to feel fulfilled?

-What are the universal truths that most speak to you - that you feel the most drawn to?

• List your top core values and principles. Use the list below for inspiration but don't let it limit you.

• If your list is longer than 10, you will need to narrow it down- a long list is hard to remember and work with, like having too much well-meaning advice. Try grouping similar values into related themes, like the headings in the example list- humanity, moderation, etc.- or make headings of your own.

• If you still need to reduce your list, ask "Which of these are essential to my life and best support my inner being, at this time?"

• Write out your top 10 (or fewer) core values, beliefs, and principles on a clean page in your journal. (To see my list, check out the "About the Author" page.)

Please add any other examples of values and principles into the comments below!