Day 6: Take a Creative Risk

Nothing changes unless we change. All the work you have done to know yourself and understand others is interesting; but it's how you use it that takes it from interesting to transformative. You are now equipped with the knowledge to transform your thoughts and feelings by acting on your Truth and extending love to the world - you can simply tune into your values and principles, and draw on your strengths and the transforming power of love.

Transforming Power is a term coined by the Alternatives to Violence Project, which was started by Quakers and inmates at the Greenhaven Prison in New York in the 1970's, at a time of great unrest and violence. Together the inmates and the Quakers developed non-violence workshops inside prisons, which continue to this day, with town and inmate students, and town and inmate leaders.

In a nutshell, Transforming Power is a river of energy at your core, made up of your essential wisdom, strength, and goodness, which you can touch in with in order to experience a shift. It might be a shift from anger or resentment to peace; it might be a shift from fear and powerlessness to strength; it might be a shift from sadness or worry to joy. 

The shift you experience might be slow and steady or like a lightning bolt, but it will contain an element of love: You become part of the whole, no longer isolated. You will experience a self-acceptance and a sense of peace that allows you to connect with others without hesitation. It's this connection that transforms you: Your view of the world is transformed, everything is different. You see people and situations in a new light, are able let go of whatever was holding you back and act - one small step at a time.

The Alternatives to Violence Manual says, “'Transforming Power’ is not dogma nor is it an item of faith. It is simply a term to refer to something that participants often experience when they respect themselves, care for others, seek a non-violent path, think before reacting, or expect the best.” AVP gives every participant a little card to carry that lists the Guides to Transforming Power. I want to highlight three:

-Base your position on truth.

-When you are clear about your position, expect to experience great inward power to act on it.

-Do not expect that this response will automatically ward off danger. If you cannot avoid risk, risk being creative rather than violent.

The final habit we will practice is the habit of creative risk-taking. Creativity is our greatest super-power, the rich resource that leads us towards transformation. You've been practicing creativity all throughout this book - you've generated creative ideas with brainstorming (which is, remember, to freely think outside the box and generate ideas without the fear of criticism); you have creatively visualized your path forward with vision walks; and then you created a map of your future.

Week 7: Act in Love + Day 1: Journal & Set Intentions

We've been occupied with love the last two weeks, coming at it from different angles. We've looked at the habits of kindness, generosity, and equanimity, and we've looked at nurturing yourself. You've been working towards Maitri, an honest and direct friendship with yourself: You pay attention to yourself the way you would a good friend - with curiosity, compassion, and gentleness. The next step, then, is to try to understand yourself even better, to be honest and clear-sighted about your strengths and limitations. What is it about you that drives and informs your values and your goals? What makes you behave the way you routinely behave?

We each have distinctive styles of how we interact with other people and our environment, and different motives, habits, and needs. This week we will look closer at your temperament and your personality. 

Your temperament is your unique style of responding to external events. The traits of temperament are those you are born with, probably inherited from your parents, and these become the foundation for your personality, which begins to develop in your early years. Personality includes your temperament, and also behaviors and preferences that you learn by experience.

It's helpful to analyze yourself a bit, and get the ducks of your personality in a row! Then you can accept your personal style, and look closer at the specific habits you need to cultivate in order to improve your relationships, and act in love.

Day 3: Map and Plan Self-Care Habits

Photo by Steve Abbott

For the next three days you will make a plan for self-renewal, a steady and persistent nurturance of the physical, mental, and spiritual parts of yourself. (We will look at the emotional and social parts next week.) Today you will start with your physical self.

Caring for your body is of obvious importance; that's what gives you the energy and health you need to be effective and succeed at your priorities. Physical self-care involves eating well, exercising, sleeping enough, playing, and also, because it's part of physical survival, budgeting, saving, and spending within your means.

You KNOW these things help: When you eat too much meat or sugar, you feel too sluggish to get much done; when you lack sleep or regular exercise, you lose focus; and when you over-work and don't take time for recreation, you get sick. And taking care of your finances reduces stress, and makes everything easier.

Take out your Love Journal:

• First review conversations and interactions you had yesterday, and your general frame of mind with the world.

• Next, think about the people you will see today, and the conversations you may have. Make note of times when you might need to draw on nurturance for yourself.

• And then answer these queries:

Day 7: Review, and Plan One Week

Take a few minutes to review your second week. Look through your journal. Write about your accomplishments and what you still need to work on. Did you:

• Brainstorm goals, dreams, and exciting ideas for the next month of your life, and write about what your best month would look like?

• Choose goals, activities, and ideas - at least one for each priority, and no more than about 20, total - that you can do this next month to move you in the direction of your most important reasons for living?

• Start a separate Inspiration Page for any goals and ideas that simply don't fit into this season of your year, or your life?

• Go on a vision walk to access your deeper, intuitive mind - your inner guide - and look at your month from the mountain top?

• Pick a theme word or phrase to describe your month ahead and distill it down to its essence?

• Make a Month Map, arranging your goals in an order that helps you picture your month ahead as a whole? (optional)

• Organize your next month goals into a priority grid, outlining your long term, complex, task-driven projects into small chunks?

Day 4: Create a Month Map

What is the contour of your month ahead? Is it a straight and clear road? Are there bumps or sharp twists and turns? Is it foggy, a jungle, mountainous, arid? Do you see rivers, highways, footpaths?

• Take a few minutes to write in your journal about your month ahead and then call it a day!

Extra Effort: This is an optional project. If it sounds fun or useful, today you can make a map of your coming month. This map doesn't need to be artistic or beautiful; the act of making it is powerful, and will help you to picture your month as a whole. You might want to create a linear route from today to the end of the month, or start in the center and radiate out like a mind map.

Day 3: Month Theme Vision Walk

Now that you have some ideas about your priorities for the month, let's try to access your deeper, intuitive mind again with another vision walk. This week you will get a glimpse of what you are moving towards, an image of the near future that will help you to see the possibilities.

Visualization is a scientifically proven technique for performance improvement, based on the idea that "seeing is believing". It also helps with relaxation and self-confidence. It works because brain neurons interpret imagery as equivalent to reality. Visualization creates new neural pathways, just like a memory or a learned behavior.

Prepare by setting out your journal, and your list of month priority goals. Begin by putting yourself in a relaxed, trance-like state. Seek a leading of the spirit with an open mind and heart:

• Set the mood: Light a candle and dim the lights, and let's try this with silence this time.

• Craft a clear intention: Say something like, "Today I call on the Spirit of Love to bring me clarity and open my eyes to the possibilities of this next month."

• Relax, breathe, walk or float: With each breath, allow your awareness to deepen and become softer. No stress. No rush. Walk or float in an imaginary void (or you might feel the need to stand and walk around your actual space).

• Go through a door: When you feel ready, see yourself moving through a doorway or opening into another space. This time you are moving onto a mountain top - a sun-drenched ridge above the tree line. Find a safe spot to sit, with your back against a warm rock, and take in the view.

• 

  View from South Sister - Photo by Carrie Mack

Day 7: Review, and Start a Map Book

Take a few minutes to review your first week. Look through your journal. Write about your accomplishments and what you still need to work on. Did you:

-- Brainstorm some lists of goals, dreams, and exciting ideas for your future, and write about your most important reasons for living, and what your best life would look like?

--Go on a vision walk to access your deeper, intuitive mind- your inner guide?

--Write a letter from your future self?

--Discern your top 10 (or fewer) core values and principles that describe the vision of who you are and how you want to proceed down your path?

--Discern your top 4 to 8 priorities that seem most important and feel most meaningful to you in your life right now, that will give your days focus and help you to decide how to best spend your time?

--Map out the relationship between your core values and your top priorities to help clarify connections and renew your sense of purpose?

Start a Map Book

Your Map Book is a place to collect your various maps and plans and creative visions as you work through this book. (I use a 3-ring binder.)

• Today, punch holes in your Base Map and put it into your empty Map Book. If your map is too large, fold it!

Summary

Day 6: Create a Base Map

Today you will make a map of your life at this point in time - a chart of the relationship between your core values and principles and your top priorities - to help clarify connections and renew your sense of purpose. Your Base Map is a "mind map", which is a combination of words and diagrams that engages your whole brain in a creative way. 

As with many exercises like this, the process is more important than the end result, so take your time. Start with a messy rough draft to get out all your ideas with no concern for how it looks, and refine it later if you want:

• Get a largish piece of paper and a pencil. 

• Start in the center: Draw a symbol for yourself, or write out ME. 

• Begin to add your core values and principles around the central shape. Add them one at a time in a way that seems natural and right: You can make them equal or rank them; group them according to type or significance; connect them to each other or only to the center; add clarifying words. If anything doesn't seem to fit, put it off to the side with a question. 

Day 3: Write About a Rosy Future

Yesterday you went into a trance to access your Inner Guide. Another way to listen to your Inner Guide is to use your imagination; let yourself get carried away into your perfect future, a utopia - where the world is safe, the earth is thriving, and you are happy and healthy.

In your imagination, you can create a future that is positive and perfect, but you will need to suspend your pessimism about the human race. For this exercise, you will need to imagine a world where the best of humanity has won out over the worst.

Also, you will need to accept that you are capable of anything you put your mind to. Set aside all limitations and imagine yourself accomplishing your biggest dreams.

Take out your journal and pen, put on some imaginary rose-colored glasses, and fast forward your life - Choose a year 5 or 10 in the future: